MONDAY, AUGUST 11, 2008
First Day of School Jitters
It’s soon back to school for your little Scooter or Sally and they are
already experiencing the first day jitters. While we as adults know the jitters
will soon pass when they reunite with their friends, meet their new teacher,
find out where they sit in class and figure out that it’s not long before
recess, getting them to school on the first day without tears (or fewer tears)
is a daunting task. As parents, there are certain things we can do to make the
summer to school transition smoother…
1. Do a rehearsal drive by, walk by or bike by – Several weeks in
advance, drive by the school and let your child see the route they will be
traveling every morning. If the school is close in proximity, make a follow up
visit when you are taking an evening walk, and then again on your bicycles. Try
guessing which window is the library, music room and cafeteria. Talk about what
will take place in each room and what kind of exciting lessons will be in store
for your child.
2. If you are a new family to the school, call the school office and ask if there is any family you may be able to meet before the first day of class - Get together with the family and let your child ask questions, and by all means you do the same.
3. Don’t skip the open house – Make attending the open house a priority. You will acquire a lot of useful information during this short period of time.
4. Walk your child to the door but don’t loiter – Give your child a hug and a kiss and don’t circle back to see how they are doing. Or at least, don’t let your child see you do this. It is worse to say goodbye the second time around.
5. Start getting into the habit of going to bed a little earlier a few weeks prior to the first day of class – Plan a special afternoon the day before school begins, preferably something fun and active that tires out your child so they will feel tired and ready to jump into be and get a good nights rest.
6. Don’t discount your child’s feelings – As an adult, we know that by the end of the first school day their anxieties will probably be much better but it doesn’t help to say “You’ll be fine, stop worrying about it” without acknowledging their feelings and fears.
7. Before the first day of school or on the way to the classroom, find out where the restrooms are located – Some children are fearful they will not know where to go. They worry that when they need to use the restroom they may have an accident because they can’t find it.
8. Know how to use a combination lock -For a bit older children that will be using combination locks for their lockers for the first time, go over the use of the lock and the locker combination.
9. Visit the school website with your child - Spend some time reviewing the cafeteria menu, supply list, teacher roster and anything and everything else that catches their interest.
10. Pick out the first day of school outfit the day before – Whether your child wears uniform, or regular clothing, have the clothes clean, pressed and ready to go. This will take a little pressure off of an already hectic morning.
11. Make a special breakfast – Offer your child a special breakfast, give them healthy choices and splurge, spending a little more time and effort than you might usually prefer. You may have to get up a little earlier but it will be worth it.
12. Explain to your child that it is normal for their tummy to feel a little fluttery – It can be helpful to understand that they are not the only ones going through the first day of school jitters.
13. Mom or dad, enjoy the rest of your day - Knowing you did
everything you could to make the first day of school as painless as possible,
have an extra cup of coffee or tea and take a few minutes to relax...
To read more of Diane’s etiquette tips, visit
Hitched.com and
Parentood.com.
WEDNESDAY, JULY 09, 2008
Coffee Shop Etiquette
It's hard for me to resist a visit to my neighborhood coffee shop in the middle of hot summer day. Especially when I know that an iced coffee or strawberry smoothie is waiting for me, along with a smiling face and someone behind the counter who remembers my name. However, there are some coffee shop tips that will make the visit more pleasant for everyone concerned.
1. Don’t use the coffee shop just for their technology. – Make sure you are not there solely to use their free WiFi. At the very least, order a cup of coffee and pretend you are there to enjoy the coffee shop ambience. Setting up shop at a table and bringing your own breakfast pastry and coffee from home is rude.
2. Don't be a showoff. If you just purchased the latest technological gadget and saunter in the coffee shop hoping to see your neighbors and friends, don't forget to turn it on before you start banging on the keys or talking on the smart phone. And by the way, don't try and borrow your son's iPod if you don't know where the ear buds go.
3. Control your new yorkie-poo-shitz-weenie terrier hybrid. While a cute pup is considered man's best friend, your doggie will not be so welcome if he attempts to take a bite out of a fellow patron’s lemon bar. The park may be a better option for you.
4. "How you bean" and "see you latte" are not funny expressions. No matter how friendly the coffee shop people may seem, you should know by now they have heard every corny play on words that has anything to do with a coffee bean. On your next visit, greet the person behind the counter with a genuine smile and cheery “hello”.
5. Talk business on your cell phone after you have ordered your latte. The people standing in line behind you waiting for their morning "pick me up" need to get to work and want their coffee before lunch. Be respectful of other customer’s time.
6. Check your coffee order before you walk away. There may be more that one "Jim" in the room. If the coffee shop is busy, consider giving your middle name. Anything that distinguishes you from the rest of the Dave's, Donna’s and Debbie's.
7. Don't get hung up on the name. Just because it's called a "coffee shop" doesn't mean there are not other options for those who are not coffee drinkers. You are likely to find smoothies, a variety of fruit juices, an assortment of pastries, bagels and cream cheese and even sandwiches for lunch.
8. Your kids are welcome until they start tearing the place down. Don't be "that family" that let's their kids go wild while others are trying to relax or work in peace and quiet. If your child starts getting fussy, enjoy a cup of coffee "to go" and come back another time when he or she is rested and can enjoy the visit.
7. Magazines and newspapers are not free unless clearly stated. Even though you routinely help yourself to the magazines at the doctor’s office, sticking the latest sports magazine in your pants and sauntering out the door may be a little more obvious in front of the barista and his/her team.
8. Clean off your pastry crumbs, coffee drips and dirty paper and plastic products before leaving the table. The next customer will appreciate your efforts. Even if a coffee shop attendant is available to clean the table, it is courtesy that will be noticed and remembered.
9. Leave your laptop (and your table) unattended at your own risk. But when you've got to "go", you've got to "go".
10. Don't forget to use the tip jar. For friendly and attentive service, there is no better way to thank the person who just smiled at you and called you by name. Note to coffee shop owners: know your customers, because people that are acknowledged by name feel valued.
11. Don't be a table squatter. If you notice the coffee shop is extremely busy and you have been at the table for a while (unless you are ordering enough coffee and food to warrant an extended seat) consider packing up your mobile office and hit the road.
12. Support your neighborhood coffee shop, not just the large chains. Sometimes, the neighborhood hidden “treasures” are pleasant alternatives to long lines and drive-through windows.
For those living or visiting the San Antonio area, there is a fabulous little coffee shop named Olmos Perk. The people are friendly, the owner is “hands on” and the coffee choices, fruit drinks and food choices are vast. You can learn more about Olmos Perk by clicking the link above.
To read more of Diane’s etiquette tips, visit Hitched.com and Parentood.com.
You may also view more of Diane’s etiquette segments by visiting SA Living.
TUESDAY, MARCH 3, 2008
The Millennial are Here to Stay
You probably saw her this morning in the elevator, typing on her BlackBerry while sipping her mocha latte. She’s a Millennial.
Or how about the young exec in the Armani suit you noticed at the restaurant yesterday, who spent his entire lunch on his cell phone, engaged in a long conversation with his mother…he’s a Millennial too.
And the guy in line at Starbucks this morning, who picked up the New York Times and actually sighed with a heavy heart as he read the headline about the thirty deaths in last night’s bombing, and the need for more American aid. The same guy who was rude to the barista for taking too long making his mocha cappuccino, and then sped away in his shiny new BMW. Yep, another Millennial.
Like it or not, the Millennial Generation is here, and taking over. The Millennial are those born from 1981 on and they are entering the workforce by storm. In the process, they are creating some serious waves… and while waves can be fun to watch they can also be hard to ride.
What isn’t fun and energizing about watching a group of twenty-something’s, sit around a conference table, brainstorming a new project. And later that evening, you can read about their ideas on their blog. Millennials are fast. They work at a pace comparable to cheetahs chasing their prey. Coming of age in a high-speed, high-tech world, their expectation is “now” and they become frustrated when things don’t move along quickly.
Millenials are pack animals. They love to work in teams, largely because of the exposure to the Internet where you can connect with someone next door or across the globe. While most of us learned about the world on family trips to Disney’s Epcot Center, this generation is emailing pen pals from Bangladesh to Sydney and sharing dreams, goals and ideas at the drop of a dime.
Millenials make quick decisions based on technological access, which is readily available, and at their fingertips, literally. They have been using cell phones, computers and instant messaging (IM) since they were toddling around the living room floor. They can program a DVD better than their parents and can figure out how to set up a Smart Phone without reading the directions. This generation is also adept at multitasking - tech or otherwise - and they are quite good at it too. Just ask them!
Many executives complain that this generation is difficult to manage. If they are to be managed successfully, management techniques may have to adapt. This is a generation that has been nurtured, to a fault, by doting parents who have sent the message, “You are special. You are loved. You can do whatever you want to do. And if you can’t, you can always move back in with us.” Because of this false sense of self, Millennials have inflated self-esteem and unrealistic expectations of success. Their confidence has been so expanded that when they get into a real workplace confrontation they don’t know how to deal with, they are ill equipped to resolve the situation. It is not uncommon for their parents to get involved if they feel their adult child was evaluated unjustly or didn’t receive the credit or recognition he deserved. These parents are called “helicopter parents”, hovering over their child with a protective eye.
Millenials want to start at the top, rather than “working up the ladder.” A recent interview-ee, in my own office, expressed the need to be making a certain amount of money within 6 months or she “would not be interested in working as hard.” Incidentally, she didn’t get the job, much less the second interview. This generation also thinks nothing of quitting a job if it is too hard or not exactly what they perceived. They see nothing wrong with changing jobs often, while looking for the “perfect fit.” And don’t try talking to them about their perceivable flaws; because they received little criticism as children, and are highly sensitive to constructive criticism or direction as adults.
Have you ever received an email or a text message from a Millennial? LOL BFF. They email in the same way that they text their friends. When brought to their attention, their reply may be “Well, you knew what I meant!” For an educated generation, with access to much more than any other generation, there is a lack of people skills to go along with their technological savvy.
Millenials are a generation of reality television, Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, American Idol, Survivor, and The Amazing Race. None of these realistically teaching the rules of the game called life. But, it is easy to judge the Millennials. They are a group unlike any we have ever seen, and it is easy to want to tell the story of “When I was a boy I walked to school, uphill, both ways, in the snow…”. With a little patience, flexibility and training, we might however find diamonds that just need a little polishing.
The old adage, “Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water,” has never been truer than it is today. The Millennial generation is inclusive, civic-minded and goal oriented. They are interested in the “Why” of situations and are willing to learn new skills and risk new challenges. We, as corporate leaders, must learn to be flexible and understanding of the group of young adults that will soon become our future leaders. This does not mean we accept mediocrity in the workplace, or an insubordinate attitude. We should however acknowledge that there are skills that can’t be learned on their PSP and Wii, while letting them know that we have something to learn from them.
